at this crazy school

“Teacher.. I have something to tell you..” a boy said.
“Yea..?”
“I have something to tell you too..” another girl said.
“ok.. you first.. “ I looked at the girl.
“You know.. My mother is working..” and at the back of my mind I thought.. Yea.. my mother works too.
“MY mother is working so that she can buy me something when I don’t cry at school.” The girl fixed her eyes on me. I just smiled.
“Haha,.. ok. Your turn..” I looked at the boy.
“Well.. I am a damn strong boy..” was what I heard he said
“Sorry.. again dear..?”
“I am a STRONG boy..” He repeated. And I smiled. My hearing can be faulty at times.
“really? How come?” I exclaimed.
“I am strong because I eat healthy food.”
“Hahah.. that’s great!” I smiled.
These are just normal conversations. There are other conversation that could just drive you nuts. You might want to laugh or scold.. but at the end of the day, everyone will smile. It’s a great day regardless what happened.


At this crazy school everyday.. I see these wonderful children. Yes.. they drive us or at least me.. crazy. They can ask and ask and ask to the limit of my words and knowledge.
Yes.. they are smart; And getting smarter. I learn a lot from them.
My life is now going double speed.. because of them. . and It’s better.

my good old days.

They are seemingly coming back. Those days that I thought I have left. It's back.. in this new life Im living. one by one. I dont know how.. but since it's back. I'll just share it.

Want to smile

To disguise the tears that are falling

Nod head

Admit to myself that I will be scared of the dark

I only seek

That you can lend some time to be with me

But you don't even give sympathy

Want to cryTo find out whether I am numb yet

The whole worldSeems like I am the only one who is tired

Doesn't matterAnyway I'm feeling sad so I'll muddle through and go for a time

If only despair and feeling useless would go far away

The sky is very greyWill itLet me forget who you are?

The darker the night

Dream disobeys

It is hard to chase and hard to enjoy in retrospect

My world is going to be destroyed

Maybe things do not happen as I wish

Tired or not?

Sleep or not?

A single shadow with no one to snuggle with

The darker the night

Dream disobeys

Who is willing to comfort?

My world is going to be destroyed

Maybe being dispirited is another kind of beauty.

A song by Jay chou. shi jie mo ri. The end of the world. I remember myself humming to this song while I was in secondary three. I never heard of the song, yet when I hummed it, It felt farmiliar to me. I search through but didnt find it. only after months later that I found this song and it's words.

now.. im listening to it again. I am trying to find my spirit again.

:D

cahaya seribu liku,

This is song that Ive been listening. :) by Siti Nurhaliza.

Berlari aku mengejar mimpiku
Dikelilingi indah warna cerita palsu
ku sangka sinar menyebelahiku...
Namun cahaya itu ditutup seribu liku.
Kini tak mungkin ku dipermainkan lagi...Oleh mereka

Satu jadi bingung
Dua tak tertanggung
Kembali ku renung.
Angin pun menyeru..Lupakan yang dulu
Bintang pun setuju.... untuk menemaniku
Sampailah kini pada suatu waktu
Ku berhadapan dengan satu fenomena baru
Ku tahu arah nak tujuJangan cuba untuk mempengaruhi ku.



meow :)

shabondama.

I have said it to myself again and again every night.
God listens, I know.

I have it sitting on my mind,
but do i have to say it?
nah.. I dont think so..
That will cost me alot of words.
I am incapable of that right now.

My heart says to let it digest and should it come out someday..
may it come out smoothly.. Inysa'Allah.

God knows what is right and wrong with me.
He know what is inside and outside of me.

May Im guided with the right decision by Him.
May I am guided to always do the right thing.
Insya'Allah.

Love. I shall continue to smile to it. May it stay with me.
Life. I shall move on with it.

may this thing that's sittng on my head.. shall only be 'shabondama'! :D

shabondamashabondamashabondama! :D